HELP NEEDED !!!

[Frosty Outlaw]

So dark i cant see who rolls thease streets
I can't understand why all this shit needs happen to me
All thease dealers and demons
no thanks to lord of those cursed semens
So many bodys of soldiers of east
But so many bodys also in thease bordels, find the peace!
All those youths behind bars, i take i look at my scars
and realize (..) none knows what God wants
i've got enuf of everyday strugglin and this worl's jugglin
I gotta start hustlin
so i can get to better place
tired of em' tryin efface my face
for politics im just another thug case(..)
but i've got raised as a hellrazor,
i cant understand how swaggas try wipe us away like dirt in erazor
the future looks dark
Tupac as rolemodel, i need someone to get back ma spark


So Heres The Deal:
I wanna fix my flow
So what i should fix?

[super!!!]

I know its hard for you because English isn't your first language. But thats the only the problem I see. Better grammar would be helpful, But thats why I want to hear you on a track, Its a lot different to reading the writtens.

[muthafuckin L]

my suggestion is to practice your rhymes out loud to a beat to see if it matches

[slick_dick]

every beat has a structure, where its usually the 2nd and 4th beat where the snare hits that the words rhyme. so what i m saying is that you have got to write in sucha way that 1 rhyming couplet fit into 1 beat loop. also, if u need to improve your english.

[O-DawG]

you can put any rhyme on any beat..its all about the flow...and if you dont write to a beat you can use it on any beat depending on how yor flow is...but the best thing you can do is practice like L said out loud nd jus pace yourself to the beat..you just need to practice flowing